As I enter my fifth month of consulting fieldwork, I continue to find myself in incredibly beautiful and unusual desert regions of Southern California. I’ve worked closely with species like the endangered Mojave desert tortoise and burrowing owl - and by that I mean exploring through open desert territory for sometimes up to 5-10 miles a day surveying for these species. Sometimes alone (mostly the drives). And sometimes with other biologists. I'm happiest when I’m on a survey crew with other biologists - it’s always inspiring to hear other their wildlife experiences since I’m still relatively new to working in the desert. We talk about all things wildlife and it makes my job so fun and interesting - we nerd out about snakes, tortoises, lizards, and all the other interesting critters of the desert. Even when I’m working on construction gigs, the whole crew loves to geek out about the raptors - owls are always a fan favorite!
Most often times though, I'm alone driving or walking long distances and I don’t have many people to talk to besides my fellow chihuahua skull, peanut butter...Haha just kidding, I’m not talking to skulls or myself...yet, but its kind of like having my own Wilson! All jokes aside though, I do feel powerful thoughts though, mostly about the impact I have on the species I work with and wondering how I can be an engaging and successful biologist. It’s in these moments that I reflect back on what my new friends share with me - it helps fuel my dream of working with endangered species.
The best part about those moments is how mentally freed I feel - there is literally not a single soul to tell you to think or do otherwise. I can simply just live in that moment with these experiences I never imagined I would live through. And feel happily present in a vast space that gives me the mental authority to trust my skills as a biologist. Literally, there is nothing for miles and I am as free as the birds that soar above me. I can be the best version of my biologist self out there and that feels very liberating. I’ve had to rely on myself in ways I haven’t had to before and that requires a special level of responsibility and safety when you're in the field alone. It’s a good feeling nonetheless - learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.
On a personality related note - I’ve been realizing how much of an extrovert I am and sometimes I feel like that doesn’t always fit the nerdy stereotype that can be attached to a scientists persona. I think those thoughts stem from a bit of imposter syndrome because in reality you can be whoever you want to be regardless of your job title. But anyways, between the independent work and meeting different people every week on wildlife surveys, it makes it hard to share deep interactions and that’s what I feel like I’m missing. I guess I’m sort of searching for a mentor in some ways too.
Lately it’s also felt challenging at times to connect my San Diego life to my desert alter ego, and maybe they just won’t ever really fully connect. It’s not a bad thing necessarily because I get to travel out in the field and encourage myself and my purpose. I guess what it boils down to is wanting to share my experiences, and feeling like I can’t sometimes because I travel and work during long, unconventional hours. I’ve definitely become more comfortable with the independence of doing fieldwork though, it is fun and I like the unconventional lifestyle that comes with it, my weeks are always different!
Simply put, I am a happily independent field biologist, but I don’t have to feel alone and that’s why I created the blog - as an outlet for me to share my invisible thoughts and dreams and type them into my virtual reality that is my DESERT DIARY. It’s important to me that I reflect on whatever strange, lovely and educational encounters I have with wildlife and communicate my experiences to be a voice for endangered species - they can’t speak or ask for help so I’d like to be apart of helping them by being a voice and caring witness!
Well, here we go. I invite you to join me on my journey, as I navigate the wildlife conservation space as a young, independent, eager and very happy desert dwelling field biologist.
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